Total Eclipse of the Heart;

10:31 PM

dear diary,
Last Saturday, followed parents and those aunties and uncle to the dharma musical performance. Cool... Luckily i din miss out tat show. it was a pretty interesting and touching performance. thou the theme was bout dharma but it never get me bored. Its named as The Perfect Circle. Performed by the Musical On Stage and the Dharma drum mountain Buddhism.Held at the KL Performing Arts Center. after the show, i m getting more interested in stage performance, especially musical one and its not bad to be in those dharma performance. let me just rant thru it, what it was about....
It was the perfomance of Siddharta. story bout the great buddha. The performance was separated into 4 th parts. first was bout the Karma and Samsara. story bout karma, What we get was wat we done. then the second part was the Buddha and Rahula...btw , Rahula is the son of Buddha. wow, the actor Rahula is very cute! PArt 3 was bout the Hui NEng..emm...dono how to explaince bout him... but he was the one who was enlightened and reciting the Diamond of Sutra.... PArt four..i forgot...After 3 hours show, oni i get to know tat the main actor, which was the one acted Buddha was the Yang Wei Han...know?hmm.. his mandarin was pretty fine not as poor as i expected. i m totaly impresed by those stories, performance and music! whaat can i commend, WOW.. din know msian can do this quite wel.. in fact, i shod start changing my biased perception on our msian..haha...Anyway, was a great show.

who care.

11:42 PM

the fellow i m talking about it today, was someone pissed me off last week. he made my days gloomy for the past few nitez... din know, din expect i would sob by what he said to me lastnite.
he break his promise. said this friendship will last long, by the msg and chat lastnite, our frenship wil jus drop to drain edi. what can i say? if it really happen, i will be regretted same to him. We mess out the friendship just by a small matter. how can it be? people take time to build and grow a frenship but can just mess it up by just a day.. this is what we experiencing now. there are just many misunderstanding between us. i tried to patch thing up, tried to forgive, but everytime ur msg or ur word just kicked me off... why cant we just talk nicely? why always end up quarrel? it wasn my intention to angry or quarrel with u, but .. i just couldn help it. maybe ur reaction and acts just werent the way i expected... disapointment will always make up anger and mistake. anyway, hope we are fine now. i really dont want to loose my best buddy. hope thing can be solved before i leave msia. When u r reading this, i sincerely telling u, it wasn my intention to angry or being coolly, in fact, i hope we can back to those day, those silly things we did together. btw, its a big influence, when u r down, it affected me and also noelle... it kinds of circle between me u noelle and fangyu.. when they start talking to me, i would assume something gonna surround between us....haha...dunno what i m supposed to tell... forget it..nitez

who care.

11:15 PM

dear diary,
it is getting to fri again. another week just passed...i have less than 2 weeks to fly..yeahuuu....haha
i cant wait the day to come. but at the same time, i will miss lots of things. parents (dont laugh, really. i know i m delighted to go off, but i m sure wil think of them, homesick), frenz -lots of them , and my bedroom...haiz.... but i m learn to live better, im goin to a new environment and to blend with new ppls... making new frenz and experiencing diff kinds of things...so i m up to it.

lately, been going to badminton with js, cc, and cy. we were like craved for sport, badminton.
Monday, we went villa flora for badminton. played for 2 hours, and we went for a short yamcha while waiting for my sis. din play well as the last time i played was weeks ago. meantime, i realized lots of things...hehe.not gonna expose them here.. its bout me, him1 and him2.
TUes, supposed we were promised for another game. but , cc just couldnt make it, so we postponed it to wed.
Wed, 9am ,as we went flora, the court was fully booked. so we decided to go tmn megah. So we had 2hours game there. then back to my house for lunch. Mum prepared them laksa again, din know its js's first time lunch in my house.haha.mum's law, got to finish up all the food...nah... kidding la...but u know my mum, she been liking to serve ppl n force ppl eat...haha...after lunched, we were up for ps.. so CTR again. played like mad.. silly of us.. then around 4, everyone back home.
Thurs, which is today. tot i ve canceled the game, but din know chit yang was so forgetful, din even bother to read my msg. so they called me up when reached my house. just outside the gate, i heard js' car. Thus, no choice, get myself on proper clothes and took my racket. we 3 went for badminton. today was bit exhausted. dono y...then lunch were out with parents. till afternoon, XXX just pissed me off. . how could she said tat so cooly and its too much for them to do tat.. did thing silently by their own and din even bother to let me know..haiz...too much la... tot we are frenz... but wat kind of frenz are they...

who care.

6:53 PM

Just another dull and spiritles day..YOoooo..life is so colorless...wanna die...die...die... so boring...life is so bored... what the heck i m stil living in this world...being a trash n pollutor living here... eat and sleep... wasting food... breathing, wasting the O2...nothing much i return to the house, society, earth, universe... i shod ve go to die like what NOelle told me to....arrrghhh.....
When i m bored, i dont like what i m doing, but i dont know what else to do. Boredom tells us that we have free time .And free time is a valuable resource that can be used to enrich our lives. yet, i don find its good to me. i cant devote to the thing i wanted to do mostly. so y have free time? i rather work all day ,get myself tired and strait go on bed..
Any recommended cure for boredom?
why i get bored easily? n its severe as to compare with others? i find this explanation would be best explain my situation now:
One source of boredom may be the endless pursuit of pleasure, for pleasure cannot be endless. Therefore, in seeking it, we are bound to be disappointed. Life is not about a quest for pleasure, but about a reason for living. Our reason for living is a personal one, and one that we create. If we create it and live up to it during our free time, we won’t experience boredom. (haha)
* if u know me, u shod understand why ....bb

who care.

6:07 PM

Aussie Dec, 2004

Dream world

outside woolworth with baskin robin on hand

Ah ma n me

sister's graduation UQ

mr koala bear

who care.

5:33 PM

2005 meditation camp at pahang

who care.

5:11 PM

fun and fan (2005)

TImesquare 2005

timesquare indoor game

on air food

somewhere in jakarta (2005's jakarta trip)

our airport

AWW... my kiddiess...daughters n sons

these r just part of them

who care.

12:11 PM

2004- Form 5

All the 5 s 7- ians buddy

tingwei, me , yiyee, and siow wei.. after graduation presentation, line dance o!

ruilin, cc, me , yi yee

my best buddy- choywan, knew her since form 1

soh pooh...SS

who care.

8:21 PM

The key to happiness is to appreciate what you have. Sounds simple. So why are so many people unhappy?

HAPPINESS IS A STATE OF MIND...Western society commonly perceives happiness as the outcome of what you achieve and acquire.
I wonder why the morning prayers begin with a series of blessings thanking God for the simple and obvious such as : Thank you, God, for giving me life....
Thank you, God, for the meal....
are they really satisfied and felt lucky to have all those things in their lives? or the series of blessings are just a saying to them?
if u r heart doesnt feel so, why can u say tat for every morning? so sorry, i cant make it... Every morning when i wake up, i have down n dead face. i m not satisfied with what i m having, i want to achieve higher and better life. Why cant God just help me on tat? u have such big power, and endless power, why not u help me ? ...Oh..damn...its just some crapz.... influenced by WX's post...just some grudges for the day..

who care.

4:52 PM

2nd of june 2007

it was my second visit to Palembang, and 6th visit to Indonesia. My first visit to Palembang was 14 years ago, when stupid bro was at the age of one. Why there? i have an uncle there, and some far far relatives. All from my dad's side. Why going there this time? To pay them a visit, and tried the nice food there. Palembang isnt a well develop state, emm.. not a state, perhaps its just a town, but with big land but deserted field. Most people living by riverside, so they are famous for fishy food.. such as PEMPEK, its super nice, bit like our deep fried golden fish balls, but it taste better n with the deep sauces, its a special dish. My relative had given us some ideas, n she was so excited to teach us how to make it, and recommend us to do such business in Msia. haha..

but, yeah, i m interested, i think its something possible, and it will make lots money too. i m serious bout her suggestion, i said i will do the promoting while mum n sis making the pempek..haha..i believe if we really get started soon we wil make money hand over fist! just like the ikan lekor? ya, it taste bit like tat, n it outlook is much nicer n freshier than it. So i believe it will turn hot n become a popular food. once we have first stall or shop, we wil open anohter! haha.. hard to believe tat im so semangat. But its a brilliant idea. mum refuse to do so. she said they are old enof, retired n not gona start up a business... fine lo...so just forget it.

along with the trip, i first met my Cousin's son n daughter, they are half indonesian, as their mum is Indonesian. but they look cute, arent like an indonesian. Then this gal, 7years, kp taggin me, n followed us to hotel. Stayed a nite in hotel with me n sis. She slept with me. I have became her babysitter, changed for her, and asked her to brush up n eat. haaha..miss her after the trip. dono y, though jus meeting her for once n spending a day with her, but its like being together for some times d..funny thing is, she cant speak mandarin....so i use malay, she use Indonesian... our conversation was like kinda funy.. duck n chicken. so got to use body language...haha... u shod know, my malay was quite bad too..hehe..

who care.

4:05 PM

Hi there.. i m here again.. what this time? complain...s.SS... i hv lots to complain bout home now... arghhh....tot there is jus a month to go, shod try to tolerate and love my family and things around more... but since the day back from Indonesia, lots of things just never go well, pissed me off!

Let me began with Mon, day i came back from Indonesia. In the custom at Indonesia airport, we were blocked down during the security check, as we carried some waterly food in carry-on baggage. As predicted. We were just trying out luck as we din able to declare it as we got it after we had declared n check in all lugages.if it was packed nicely, we should we able to bring it back. its my favourite Food, Mee Chelor!! with the soup, we couldn bring it in. So we just left all the food for the working stuff.

Then, it was Wed, i did my online visa application. The comp was didn run well, as i guess the system had been infected by the trojan d..haiz...another headache.. guesss, need to ask for help again, reformat the whole comp.. THanks to bro... always create problems yet he dono how to heal it. STUPID !!!
also, this laptop...haiz... just pissed me off..it runs so slow tat sholdn be so...its a new laptop how can it run like an old slow working comp???!!!ARHGHGH

THUrs, tot the visa application was done. To proceeed to my visa, i was supposed to do my medi n xray. Okie, so after getting everything done, went to State to do for my medi...Went there with dad...while was waiting for the check up. THey found a mistake in my details... i Miss out an A in my passport details...OH MY GOD... which mean tat, i ve given a wrong detail in the visa application too... gosh..gosh... tot i mus be dying this time.. As the application stated, once paid n applied, there is no way to change the detail d.... if i failed to change back the correct info, mean i got to redo the whole guestionnaaire n pay another AUD$430??? oh no.... mum n dad got scold bout this... BUt to my surprise, they didnt.. so quickly came home, i was told to email the Aus immigration, acknowledge them bout my problem n hoping something can be done.. so now, i m waiting for their great news. hope thing wil be fine.. frustrated with myself, always so blur n careless.. did al those stupidity silly mistakes..n created so many problem.so now, everything on hold. got to wait til tues for their reply as mon is a holida in Aussie.

then, its fri. went pyramid. watched Ocean 13. to me, quite a boring show..din able to attract me, thou Matt Demon n Brad Pitt in there.. the story is like never be possible.. things run so smoothly in a nite, n such popular and well accomplish hotel and casino can just run down by this bunch of ppl?? haahaha.... but yea.. nice hotel, high standard hotel..without security?lolx.. sorry for telling tat, if u ppl haven watch it, maybe can go for a look, no harm. with student card, 6bucks nia la...hahaaha..oh yaa, complain.. at nite, dad suddenly came in n asked me where i went n wat i did toda...i told... n b4 i went out, i told them d, yet,he still asking... n know wat, he wanted me to write him a report whenever i m out. where i go n wat i do with who....blah bla...gosh gosh... it really pissed me off. im 20!! i m not 12! y must u control everything n even this?? i know its for safety precution but not like tat. i told u, u shod trust me, n y must u control everything of my life?? y not u control ur spoilt son. letting him be, do wat eva he wants freely, no manners, no respect, yet u stil can let him be n tolerate him??? he cant do all he wants, but with the same thing, i cant do it!! its so unfair!! UNFAIR!! the more u control and being unfair, the hardest for me to reconnect with him..if tats wat u all want from us. i will never like this bro, cz he is far well treated and pampered by u ppl..i learn to tolerate n ignore all ur behavior and acts, but there is a limit. Dont try to test my patience. Trying to be nice, and love you ppl, as its jus a month more for me to with family, but, it jus disappoinment. the bond wil never get better if u not letting go n learn from mistake. pray hard for everyone in the family.

who care.