Total Eclipse of the Heart;

12:33 PM

13 May 2007

Many things happened in this week. Mostly were bad things and those upset moments. Suria’s mood swing easily and get affected by others, family and friend.

To my parents:
why can’t they learn to be happy? Why must they get affected easily by person that is not worth for them to worry about? They should know it isn’t the first time for him to piss them off and this is a daily happening EVEnt, why stil get bothered and get so pissed off by what he spoken? He tried to turn the house down, to make us fight against each others, why would you all wanted to be his bait?? Why aren’t you all just ignore and learn be smarter? “If we cant live so as to be happy. Let us least live so as to deserve it.” By that saying, I believe you all still not letting go. Always reminding me not to be affected by the chaos, asking me to live as who I am and how I shod be, yet, you are spoiling my life. Maybe ‘spoiling’ is a heavy word, but its true. After so long, finally I make up my patience toward brother, never get involve into argument and fight with him, ignore those bad things. But why cant you both? Attended so many talks, and advices given by others, still you all learn nothing from that. Dad and brother are getting worst. Mum, why can’t you just let them go? It’s sad to see you three keep involving in the same problem. It’s worst when you all trying to put all the blame to me and sister. What we did that piss you both more than brother did? It’s just unfair…Just because he is abnormal, we got to take all his blames?? No way, I have been tolerating all the while. It’s such unfair that you both care so much for him. How bout me? Don’t expect me to be such understanding at all times. There are also times when I can’t accept it. I don’t want my life been ruin by him. I strongly believe in karma and family is a circle. One affects another. Every time it goes, it will run in a circle and it will come back to you if nobody trying to solve it. I am a psychology student yet I did nothing for all these.. I seem to be a failure. Mum tends to complain that I been helping other so much, spending my time on others but not to my own family. I dono why, just feel that it’s impossible for us to get over it. Just let it be bah…so that I won’t see myself as a failure. At least when I m helping outside, I feel I m more useful than home. At least other appreciates what I have been doing to them.

To my friend:
Friendship is just like romance, it needs to be worked on to keep it fresh, alive and strong. If taking bestie for granted, drop her off when other comes on, that’s a sign tat u aren’t doing enough to nurture the friendship. Fortunately, I m a loyal, consistent and reliable friend… hehe.. at least to few of them? Yea, I am..no doubt..haha..pergi mana oso ajak you guys wat….seldom have world of two person. No worry, because of that, I appreciate more the time when we both spend together =)
* to my girlfriend, u r great. Don’t know how to explain my feeling, but u r always the best. Though u will not see this, but still I want to express my feeling here, I am glad to have u as my bestie. =) Yesterday read an article about <>. Hope I m not one of them. Although time we spend together are not as much as last time, yet, I always care about you. I am always your good listener and BEstie!!

who care.